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Lessons from My 20s
As I navigate the winding road of my twenties—messy, magical, and everything in between—I’ve found myself craving a space to pause, reflect, and simply *be*. Lessons from My 20s is a journal-style series capturing the unfiltered truths, tender moments, and tiny awakenings that come with growing up and growing into yourself.
These entries are for anyone who’s ever felt stuck between who they’ve been and who they’re becoming. For the overthinkers, the late bloomers, the quiet dreamers, and the loud feelers. Through storytelling, reflection, and honesty, I hope this space becomes a soft landing—for me and for you.
Entry 10: From Surviving To Thriving
I think I eased into the land of living when, in 2021, surprisingly, in the midst of the pandemic. I was 21, still unsure about a lot of things, and still worrying about all things, but I felt like I’d lay my hustle down and set it aside.
Me surviving is me hustling — to get through the day, to check off the to-dos and the expectations, and carry multiple loads that reach the heavens. It’s the nights I plop into bed feeling mentally exhausted, with each ounce of my bones a
19 hours ago3 min read
Entry # 9: Success Beyond The Numbers
I used to believe that to be successful, you always had to be “on”. You had to be well put together in body, mind, and soul. You needed both beauty to charm people and the brain to show them there’s more than this pretty face. There was little room for mistakes, and less for vulnerability. What mattered was showing up and bringing results to the table each and every time.
I’m learning success goes beyond the numbers — it’s a balance between mind and muscle, brain and hear
3 days ago2 min read
Entry 8: Anxiety Fuels My Betrayal
Those who know, know. Anxiety is like the best friend you never asked for and the critic over your shoulder that you just can’t shake. My anxiety is sometimes the loud, prominent, and nagging instigator behind self-betrayal.
It’s saying no to things I actually do want, to the places I actually do want to go, or the opportunities I do want to explore. Like light dimming to make space for darkness, the inner Yes is shut down by the firm No of my Anxiety.
4 days ago3 min read
Entry 7: Healing In Progress
Healing is, was realizing that people can’t give what they don’t have. It’s learning — yes, learning as in I’m still doing it — that maybe they gave their best. Maybe I wanted more, or expected more. Love? Attention? Understanding? But it wasn’t in their cup to give.
May 62 min read
Entry #6: Progressing Rather Than Arriving
I think one of the few things I’ve always been sure of is the uncertainty and unexpectedness of life. I can’t say I truly ever let myself think or feel as if I’ve arrived or finished, because then I’m inviting life to humble me, and show me just how far I have to go.
May 13 min read
Entry # 4: Introversion Is Not Less Than
Let’s get right to it, I’m evolving from the idea that if you’re introverted, you’re somewhat less than. Less than what, I’m not quite sure. Maybe less valuable? Less intellectual? Less worthy? Less lovable. Thinking back to movies and stories I’ve seen — you know the ones — introverts are the wallflowers, the ones forgotten or ignored, and who never get to see their day in the spotlight because it wasn’t made for people like us. People — it feels mostly intentional— shame in
Apr 204 min read
Entry 5: Strength = Survival
Note: Lessons from My 20s is A reflective series by Black Bonnet Girls. Lessons from My 20s is a journal-style series capturing the unfiltered truths, tender moments, and tiny awakenings that come with growing up and growing into yourself. These entries are for anyone who’s ever felt stuck between who they’ve been and who they’re becoming. For the overthinkers, the late bloomers, the quiet dreamers, and the loud feelers. Through storytelling, reflection, and honesty, I ho
Apr 204 min read
Entry #3: Loving What’s Real
The costs of associating love with performance makes it transactional — I perform my best and cater to your needs, and you, the audience, applaud, throwing flowers in the air and shouting encore, with desires to have more and see more on the grand stage. The thought alone is tiring.
Apr 193 min read
Entry #1: Discovery
Looking back at the photos, I’m proud of my 20-year-old self for baking cookies and donuts, and
Whipping up soups, stews, and my favorite—chicken pot pie—was all new but certainly brought me joy.
Apr 152 min read
Entry #2: What I Thought I Needed vs. What I Actually Needed
Okay, so I’ll raise my hand and admit I’ve done therapy wanting to know why I think the way I do or do the things I do — beyond what my own understandings are or were. And honestly, no regrets. I hate the stigma around therapy and just the narrative that something must be— had to be — wrong with you to seek mental health help. Maybe there is, but isn’t there something wrong with all of us? Anyway, a pivotal moment or session, I should say, was...
Apr 154 min read
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